A Shadow Beneath A Shadow

Shackled by one's own lack of faith, lack of trust, and inability to fight back. The chains beat the ground with a earie stillness. How can something so heavy be inaudible, yet one person can hear it....That person is you. Only you know the weight you carry behind you. Only you can tell someone that you need help. However, most of us lack the strength to allow another person to help us. Being vulnerable is a difficult task. It could be pride; you think you can handle it on your own. But that is not usually the case. Putting a band aid over a dam..... eventually the dam will burst with incomprehensible consequences.

The fog begins to set in. Vison becoming blurry. Chest feels heavy, and the throat becomes constricted as the fight begins. Can't breathe, can't see, can't feel. Numb throughout the entire body. Tears fight to fall, you fight back. Your body feels weak, but you want to be strong. "This won't beat you, not today. I don't feel sad. I'm okay..." You try to repeat the lie as loud as you can.

The thought lingers. "Should I just give up? Is the today the day I finally have to courage to go through with it?" Stare at your wrist, hold on tight to that gun, firmly hold the steering wheel, stand near the edge of the cliff, stare at the pills on your dresser.....

Whatever the poison, it is not worth it. Sleep on the thought, because you may not feel the same way, come the morning. It is dangerous to be alone with those thoughts. Call someone you trust no matter how difficult. It is not easy, even to this day, I don't call anyone when I desperately need the help. It has its consequences. But I want you to be better than me. Be stronger. Those who call people when they need help, now those are some of the strongest people out there. So please be better than me and ask for help. Maybe when I see you do just that, it will give me the courage to do the same. Let's be better together and reach out a hand, for hopefully someone will be there to unlock the chains.